There’s something about Mary

(FIRST DRAFT)

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WARNING: This little reflection of mine is still very much a work in progress—been tinkering with it for the better part of a month now. I have taken to fact-checking and chatting with my women friends to gather their thoughts. For all my effort, I must admit a plain truth: I cannot, for the life of me, think like a woman. It is not for lack of trying, mind you, but there are depths to their thinking that remain, for me, as mysterious as the far side of the moon.

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Let me tell you a tale about two Marys, the most famous Marys in history. I am not speaking of any ordinary Mary, but two extraordinary women who lived around the same time: Mary, the mother of Jesus, and Mary Magdalene.

Now, let us set religion aside. This is not about belief or faith. What I want to discuss is how women were treated in earlier times, as reflected in the stories and traditions passed down to us. Women were expected to be one thing and not another, and when they did not conform, they were either vilified or constrained.

I am not one to spare women from criticism either. Many women, like men, are self-centered—narcissistic, if you will—driven by their own concerns. However, much of this instinct is tied to protecting their families and ensuring stability. Many choose safer paths when it comes to their roles in society, including careers. There is nothing inherently wrong with this, but it reflects the expectations placed upon them.

Let us begin with Mary, the mother of Jesus. She has been cast as a virgin for eternity, despite the Bible mentioning Jesus’ brothers and sisters. Joseph, her husband, disappears from the story after Jesus’ birth. Was she a widow? Was she left to raise her family alone? We cannot say, because it does not seem to matter. In the eyes of the church, Mary was a virgin and a vessel for divine will—her humanity and complexity were erased in favor of an idealized image.

Then there is Mary Magdalene, whose story is even more confounding. She has been labeled a prostitute, although there is no evidence to support this claim. It appears to be a fabrication that gained traction over time. Some sources outside the biblical canon describe her as a close companion of Jesus, possibly even a romantic partner. Yet history has reduced her to a figure of sin and repentance, despite her role as one of Jesus’ most devoted followers and a witness to his resurrection.

These two Marys represent opposing archetypes that society has historically assigned to women. Mary, the mother, is the virtuous, nurturing figure, the embodiment of purity and sacrifice. Mary Magdalene, in contrast, is framed as the repentant sinner, the woman redeemed by male guidance. Together, they reveal the narrow framework through which women’s lives and choices have often been understood.

This is not merely a story about ancient times; it is a lens through which we can view the continued challenges faced by women today. The stories of these Marys are not just relics of history but reflections of societal attitudes that persist. By revisiting and questioning these narratives, we can begin to see beyond the labels and appreciate the complexity and humanity of women past and present.

Gender Roles and Societal Expectations

Now, if there’s anything the two Marys can teach us, it’s how society loves to stuff women into neat little boxes, all tied up with a bow of expectations. Mary, the mother, gets cast as the pure, nurturing, selfless saint—the kind of woman folks like to set on a pedestal so high she can hardly move. Meanwhile, poor Mary Magdalene has spent centuries hauling around the baggage of a label she likely never earned, pinned as a repentant sinner. Together, they make up the oldest trick in the book: the “Madonna and the whore” routine. It’s tidy, sure, but it’s about as nuanced as a bull in a china shop.

These archetypes don’t leave much room for reality. They flatten women into symbols, denying them the mess and complexity that men have been granted in spades. To say women are “instinctively driven” to prioritize safety and family isn’t wrong, but it’s a bit like calling the ocean “wet”—true, but not the whole picture. Plenty of women, even in the tightest societal corsets, have dared to stride boldly into the realms of thought, art, and politics, carving out paths where none existed before.

Why it Matter

The stories of the Marys aren’t just dusty old tales—they’re mirrors. They reflect how society has framed women, not just then, but now. By looking closely at these stories, we see the scaffolding of stereotypes, the ways women have been elevated or diminished to fit someone else’s narrative. And in doing so, we can start to pull those structures apart.

This isn’t just an exercise in nostalgia or literary curiosity. These old stories have long shadows, and they stretch into the way we think about gender roles today. Reexamining them isn’t just about understanding history—it’s about reclaiming a broader, richer humanity for everyone.

Feel free to share your thoughts on this or any other musings rattling around my brain. Drop me a line at **[email protected]** —I’d love to hear from you.

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On going Research

Mary, Mother of Jesus
Mary, as the mother of Jesus, is often depicted as the epitome of purity and virtue. The doctrine of her perpetual virginity underscores how societies historically demanded unattainable ideals of chastity and obedience from women, tying their worth to their sexuality. Despite biblical mentions of Jesus’ siblings, the church’s insistence on her virginity effectively erases her full humanity, reducing her identity to a singular role: the holy vessel for divine will. This narrative sidelined any broader exploration of her as a woman, mother, or individual.

The absence of Joseph after Jesus’ birth also adds to the mystique but leaves unanswered questions. Was Mary a widow, a single mother, or a symbol deliberately kept unencumbered by worldly relationships to preserve her sanctity? Regardless, the narrative reinforces the expectation of women to embody virtue, sacrifice, and service without acknowledgment of personal agency or desires.

Christian tradition, especially in Catholic and Orthodox theology, holds that Mary was taken bodily into heaven at the end of her life, an event known as the Assumption in the West and the Dormition in the East. This is not recorded in the Bible but is part of later Christian teachings and apocryphal writings.

Some traditions claim that Mary lived in Ephesus, cared for by the Apostle John, while others suggest she remained in Jerusalem. There are no definitive historical records, but sites in both cities are venerated as places associated with her later years.

Mary is venerated in Christian tradition not only as the mother of Jesus but also as a spiritual figure who symbolizes obedience, humility, and devotion. Her prominence grew over centuries, particularly in Catholic and Orthodox theology, which regard her as an intercessor and the “Mother of God.”

The sparse biblical references leave much to interpretation. Some view her primarily as a passive figure in Jesus’ life, while others emphasize her active faith and courage in navigating a path fraught with societal challenges and spiritual uncertainty.

Mary Magdalene
Mary Magdalene is an equally complex figure. While traditionally labeled a prostitute—a characterization lacking any solid biblical basis—she is also portrayed as one of Jesus’ most devoted followers. In some non-canonical texts, like the *Gospel of Mary*, she is even presented as a confidante and spiritual leader, suggesting her prominence in Jesus’ ministry.

The label of “prostitute” appears to stem from historical conflations and misinterpretations of texts. The Western church’s depiction of her as a “fallen woman” contrasts sharply with her role as a witness to Jesus’ resurrection, making her one of the most significant figures in Christian narratives. Nowhere in the Gospels is Mary Magdalene explicitly described as a prostitute. This misconception likely arose from a sermon by Pope Gregory I in 591 CE, where he conflated her with other women in the Gospels, such as the unnamed “sinful woman” who anointed Jesus’ feet (Luke 7:36-50). Non-canonical texts, such as the Gospel of Mary (a Gnostic text), suggest Mary Magdalene had a special relationship with Jesus, possibly as a confidante or spiritual equal. These texts portray her as having deep understanding and insight into Jesus’ teachings, which sometimes caused tension with other disciples. This association persisted for centuries, shaping her image in Western Christianity. This dichotomy reveals a cultural tendency to diminish women’s roles by attaching stigmatizing labels, especially when they step into spheres of influence or power traditionally reserved for men.

Some modern interpretations, including speculative works like The Da Vinci Code, have suggested a romantic relationship or marriage between Mary and Jesus. There is no historical evidence for this claim, but it reflects ongoing fascination with her role in Jesus’ life.

Mary Magdalene’s role in the early church was significant. In many apocryphal writings, Mary is depicted as a leader among Jesus’ followers, often engaging in theological debates with male disciples.
Witness to the Resurrection: Her witness to the resurrection is central to Christian theology, highlighting her importance in the faith’s foundational narrative.
Mary Magdalene is honored as a saint in both Western and Eastern Christianity. Her feast day is celebrated on July 22.
In Christian art and tradition, Mary is often depicted holding a jar of ointment, symbolizing her role in anointing Jesus. This has led to her association with themes of repentance and devotion.

Recent scholarship has sought to disentangle her from the erroneous image of a repentant prostitute, emphasizing her role as a prominent disciple and a witness to the resurrection.

Mary Magdalene is a complex figure: a devoted follower of Jesus, the first witness to the resurrection, and a central character in Christian tradition. While much about her life remains uncertain, her courage, faith, and role in Jesus’ ministry and resurrection have made her an enduring and inspirational figure. Modern scholarship and theology increasingly celebrate her as a leader and equal among Jesus’ disciples, challenging centuries of misconceptions

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