The trouble with the internet isn’t that there’s too much advice — it’s that there’s too much bad advice, and it’s wearing a top hat and calling itself an expert. Back in my day, fools stood on soapboxes in the town square. Now they have podcasts, online courses, and viral TikToks, all eager to tell you how to get rich, get famous, or get happy — usually in under 30 days.
Now, I’ve got nothing against ambition, but you’d do well to remember that a loud voice and a big following ain’t the same thing as wisdom. A wise man might whisper, while a fool will shout until his lungs give out — and the fool’s audience will clap every time.
So, if you’re setting out to find yourself a mentor, be careful. The wrong advice can cost you more than money — it can cost you years. And life, as I’ve found, is too short to spend it chasing someone else’s mistakes.
So if you take nothing else from this, remember: any halfwit can rent a stage, print a business card, or buy followers by the pound. But a true mentor? That’s someone who’s lived enough life to be humbled by it. They’ve earned their wisdom the old-fashioned way — by getting it wrong first.
Choose the kind of mentor who’d rather help you think than tell you what to think. And if a man offers you a shortcut to success, ask him where it goes first — because most shortcuts lead straight off a cliff.
The internet’s full of noise, but wisdom’s still out there. It just doesn’t shout as loud.
No let’s break it down point by point.
As a young professional, you’re surrounded by advice from every corner of the internet — YouTube, books, podcasts, online forums, and live events. Everyone seems to have an opinion on how to succeed. But not all advice is created equal, and not every person with a platform is worth following.
The truth is, popularity doesn’t equal wisdom, and the loudest voices aren’t always the smartest. Your mentors — the people whose advice shapes your career and values — can either accelerate your growth or send you chasing the wrong goals.
Here’s how to choose mentors wisely, across the different platforms and media you’re exposed to:
📺 YouTube & Social Media Influencers
✅ Pros:
- Free, fast, and easily accessible.
- Great for quick tips, personal development, and trend updates.
- Visual — you get a sense of their personality and energy.
❌ Cons:
- Many prioritize building a personal brand over sharing hard truths.
- Advice can be oversimplified for entertainment value.
- Popularity doesn’t always come from actual experience or success.
- Highlight reels rarely show failures, only the curated “wins.”
🔎 How to Spot Quality:
- Do they openly share mistakes and struggles, not just highlight moments?
- Do they have real-world credibility, not just online fame?
- Are they transparent about what they know and what they don’t?
- Are they teaching principles or just pushing hacks and trends?
📚 Books
✅ Pros:
- Structured and thoughtful — often presenting full frameworks, not just tips.
- Often backed by years of experience or research.
- Easier to revisit for long-term learning.
❌ Cons:
- No interaction — you can’t ask for clarification or personalized advice.
- Some books are really just marketing tools for expensive programs.
- It’s hard to verify how much of the author’s success is replicable.
🔎 How to Spot Quality:
- Who endorses the book — respected peers or just influencers?
- Does the author have real-world success in what they teach?
- Is the book still recommended years later, or just a flash in the pan?
- Do they share failures and pivots alongside their strategies?
💬 Online Chats & Forums (Reddit, Discord, LinkedIn Groups)
✅ Pros:
- Interactive — you can get personalized advice.
- Access to many perspectives, from peers to veterans.
- Real-time advice often reflects current trends and issues.
❌ Cons:
- Anyone can post — advice quality is wildly inconsistent.
- Comments lack context — what works for one person may not fit your situation.
- Hard to verify who is actually giving advice.
🔎 How to Spot Quality:
- Do contributors have a track record in the community?
- Are they asking you follow-up questions, or just spitting advice?
- Are they willing to say “I’m not sure” when appropriate?
🎤 Live Events & Conferences
✅ Pros:
- See speakers in action — how they handle pressure and audience questions.
- Great for networking with potential mentors.
- You see how their peers respect them.
❌ Cons:
- Many events prioritize entertainment and hype over education.
- Short talks rarely go deep.
- Some speakers are more focused on sales than substance.
🔎 How to Spot Quality:
- Do they share real stories, mistakes, and practical advice?
- Are they approachable after their talk?
- Are they tailoring content to the audience’s needs, or using a canned pitch?
🎓 Live Courses & Workshops
✅ Pros:
- Highly interactive — you can ask direct questions.
- Opportunity for personalized feedback.
- Structure keeps you accountable.
❌ Cons:
- Quality varies — some are transformational, others are cash grabs.
- Can be expensive.
- The value depends heavily on how much you engage.
🔎 How to Spot Quality:
- Does the instructor have real experience or just good marketing?
- Is the course designed for your level, or is it too generic?
- Do past participants report real-world results?
- Is the focus on your growth — or upselling you?
Paid vs. Unpaid Mentors
🟢 Unpaid Mentors (Organic Relationships)
✅ Pros:
- Often more personal — they care about your success.
- No financial pressure — advice can feel genuine.
- Can evolve into long-term relationships.
❌ Cons:
- Limited time — you’re not their top priority.
- May lack a structured plan for your development.
- They may soften hard truths to avoid awkwardness.
Best For:
- Ongoing career guidance.
- Learning from someone in your industry.
- Building a long-term professional relationship.
🟡 Paid Mentors (Coaches, Consultants)
✅ Pros:
- You’re paying for dedicated attention.
- Often have structured processes for goal setting and tracking.
- You can choose someone with expertise outside your network.
❌ Cons:
- Quality varies — marketing skills don’t equal coaching skills.
- Some focus on keeping you paying, rather than pushing for independence.
- Can feel transactional if you don’t click personally.
Best For:
- Specific skills (negotiation, leadership).
- Career pivots or industry changes.
- Accountability and structured planning.
How to Spot a Good Mentor (Any Format)
✅ They practice what they preach. Their career and life reflect the advice they give.
✅ They admit mistakes. They share failures as learning moments.
✅ They ask you questions. They help you think, not just copy their formula.
✅ They listen first. They want to understand your goals, not just push their agenda.
✅ They’re respected by others. Not just popular online, but respected by peers, employees, and clients.
✅ They balance life and work. True success isn’t just about money or titles.
🚩 Red Flags (Any Format)
🚩 They only show the highlight reel — no struggles, no setbacks.
🚩 They promise guaranteed success or shortcuts.
🚩 They crave attention more than helping others.
🚩 They push you into values or choices that don’t fit you.
🚩 They treat you like a transaction, not a person.
The Bottom Line
Whether you’re reading a book, watching YouTube, joining a workshop, or chatting in an online forum — the most important skill you can develop is filtering for quality advice.
The best mentors — whether paid or unpaid — help you succeed on your own terms, not by copying their path, but by helping you discover your own.
In a noisy world, choosing your mentors wisely might just be the most important career decision you make.
EXTRA CREDIT
A Culture of Bad Leadership
YODA now, you are.
Authenticity: Finding Your Voice in a Noisy World
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