America, my friends, is a land of many wonders. We have more varieties of potato chips than some nations have laws, more reality shows than we have reality, and—most impressively—we have enough intelligence agencies to make a paranoid feel downright justified. Eighteen of them, to be exact.
Yes, in the great wisdom of our republic, we did not settle for just one shadowy cabal peering into the world’s secrets—we built a whole league of them. Nine answer to the Department of Defense, two to Homeland Security, two to Justice, and even the Department of Energy gets its own set of spies (presumably to ensure we don’t build nuclear-powered toasters). Then there’s one for the State Department, a lone and mysterious agency that answers to no department at all, and—like the captain of this clandestine ship—one central agency that coordinates the whole affair.
Now, before you start imagining a nation teeming with James Bonds in tuxedos, gliding across rooftops with laser watches, let me put your mind at ease. The cold, hard truth is that intelligence work is about as thrilling as a government accounting exam. Less than 1% of CIA agents are assassins—though I’m sure that won’t stop Hollywood from pretending otherwise. The other 99%? Nerds. Analysts. Bureaucrats buried under mountains of classified paperwork, parsing through reports to decide whether a grain shipment in Moldova is suspicious or just late. If you ever meet an intelligence officer, chances are they’ll be wearing a wrinkled suit and a caffeine dependency, not wielding a silenced pistol in some glamorous European casino.
Why so many agencies? Well, dear reader, if you ask them, each has its purpose. If you ask me, bureaucracy breeds like rabbits, and once a committee takes root in Washington, it’s harder to remove than a tick on a stray cat. But for all their numbers, their purpose remains singular: to peer into the darkness and whisper secrets to those who hold the reins of power. Whether those whispers are heard—or, heaven forbid, understood—is another matter entirely.
So congratulations, to Tulsi Gabbard—this labyrinth of 18 intelligence agencies is now yours to herd like stray cats. And a heart felt good luck, because coordinating this shadowy circus is going to feel like it. Watch your back, as you know you can’t trust any of them..
America’s 18 Intelligence Agencies
| # | Agency | Abbreviation | Founded | Location | Director (2025) | Approx. Employees | Budget (Est.) | Primary Focus | Parent Organization | Mission |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| 1 | Office of the Director of National Intelligence | ODNI | 2005 | McLean, VA | Tulsi Gabbard | ~1,750 | ~$3B | Coordination & Oversight | Independent | Coordinates intelligence efforts, publishes the Presidential Daily Brief. |
| 2 | Air Force Intelligence | AF ISR | 1948 | Joint Base San Antonio, TX | Lt. Gen. Leah G. Lauderback | ~10,000 | ~$10B | Aerial Surveillance & Cyber | DoD | Surveillance, reconnaissance, cyber & electronic warfare. |
| 3 | Army Intelligence | INSCOM | 1776 | Fort Belvoir, VA | Maj. Gen. Michele H. Bredenkamp | ~17,500 | ~$12B | Military Intelligence | DoD | Multi-discipline intelligence, security operations. |
| 4 | Central Intelligence Agency | CIA | 1947 | Langley, VA | John Ratcliffe | ~21,500 | ~$18B | HUMINT & Covert Ops | Independent | Foreign intelligence, covert operations. |
| 5 | Coast Guard Intelligence | CGI | 1950 | Washington, D.C. | Rear Adm. Andrew S. Sugimoto | ~1,100 | ~$1B | Maritime Intelligence | DHS | Maritime intelligence, Homeland Security. |
| 6 | Defense Intelligence Agency | DIA | 1961 | Washington, D.C. | Lt. Gen. Scott D. Berrier | ~16,500 | ~$10B | Military Intelligence | DoD | Military intelligence, surveillance, reconnaissance. |
| 7 | National Geospatial-Intelligence Agency | NGA | 2005 | Fort Belvoir, VA & St. Louis, MO | Vice Adm. Frank D. Whitworth III | ~14,500 | ~$15B | Geospatial & Satellite Imagery | DoD | Geospatial intelligence (satellite imagery, mapping). |
| 8 | National Reconnaissance Office | NRO | 1961 | Chantilly, VA | Dr. Christopher Scolese | ~3,000 | ~$20B | Satellite Reconnaissance | DoD | Space reconnaissance, satellite intelligence. |
| 9 | National Security Agency | NSA | 1952 | Fort Meade, MD | Gen. Paul M. Nakasone | ~40,000 | ~$20B | Signals Intelligence (SIGINT) & Cyber | DoD | Signals intelligence, cyber operations. |
| 10 | Space Delta 18 (U.S. Space Force Intelligence) | SD-18 | 2022 | Wright-Patterson AFB, OH | Col. Marqus Randall | ~500 | ~$1B | Space Intelligence & Defense | DoD | Space domain security, satellite defense. |
| 11 | Homeland Security Intelligence & Analysis | I&A | 2002 | Washington, D.C. | Ken Wainstein | ~1,000 | ~$3B | Domestic Threat Intelligence | DHS | Provides intelligence to state/local agencies. |
| 12 | Drug Enforcement Administration – Office of National Security Intelligence | DEA-ONSI | 1973 | Arlington, VA | Louis J. Milione | ~1,500 | ~$2B | Narco-Terrorism | DOJ | Narco-terrorism, drug-related intelligence. |
| 13 | Federal Bureau of Investigation – National Security Branch | FBI-NSB | 2005 | Washington, D.C. | Charles “Paul” Abbate | ~35,000 | ~$10B | Counterintelligence & Terrorism | DOJ | Counterterrorism, counterintelligence. |
| 14 | Department of Energy – Office of Intelligence & Counterintelligence | DOE-OICI | 1977 | Washington, D.C. | Dr. Kimberly A. Budil | ~1,500 | ~$2B | Nuclear Intelligence | DOE | Protects nuclear secrets. |
| 15 | Department of State – Bureau of Intelligence & Research | INR | 1945 | Washington, D.C. | Brett M. Holmgren | ~300 | ~$1B | Diplomatic Intelligence | DOS | Diplomacy-focused intelligence. |
| 16 | Department of the Treasury – Office of Terrorism & Financial Intelligence | TFI | 1961 | Washington, D.C. | Shannon Corless | ~1,200 | ~$2B | Financial Intelligence | DOT | Monitors financial crime, terrorist funding. |
| 17 | Marine Corps Intelligence Activity | MCIA | 2000 | Quantico, VA | Brig. Gen. Dimitri Henry | ~1,000 | ~$1B | Tactical Intelligence | DoD | Tactical intelligence for Marine operations. |
| 18 | Office of Naval Intelligence | ONI | 1882 | Suitland, MD | Rear Adm. Michael A. Brookes | ~3,000 | ~$3B | Maritime Intelligence | DoD | Maritime intelligence for U.S. Navy |
The Total U.S. Intelligence Budget is usually around $80–$90 billion annually, To put it in perspective, with a budget of $90 billion, you could buy approximately 6 Ford-class aircraft carriers and 3 Virginia-class nuclear submarines with the remaining funds every year.
With very little in checks and balance, and most items being somewhat classified there is plenty opportunity for money getting lost.
