Category: My Rich Uncle

Maria showed up at Uncle Bob’s house late Saturday afternoon carrying a laptop under one arm and its power supply tangled around the other. She was in her early twenties, in college, smart, opinionated, and—as Uncle Bob liked to remind her—dangerously confident around technology she didn’t understand. MARIA: Uncle Bob, I need a favor. UNCLE BOB: That sentence has cost me a lot of money over the years. MARIA: My computer is acting weird. UNCLE BOB: “Acting weird” is a very precise technical diagnosis. MARIA: It freezes. Sometimes it won’t connect to Wi-Fi. And yesterday it told me I … Continue readingThe Laptop and the Loaf of Bread

By the time Dylan and Dorian returned Uncle Bob’s canoe, the sun was beginning to disappear behind the trees. The two young men carried the canoe upside down between them, with Dylan walking backward and Dorian struggling under the heavier end. “Slow down,” Dylan said. “You’re going to hit the truck.” “I’m not going to hit the truck.” “You said that about the mailbox.” “The mailbox moved.” Uncle Bob stood beside his convertible with a glass of iced tea in one hand. He watched them weave across the driveway like two men carrying a telephone pole through a furniture … Continue readingThe Canoe, and the Five-Percent Plan for Building Wealth

Dylan and his friend Dorian pulled into Uncle Bob’s driveway a little after nine on Saturday morning. The canoe was already resting on two wooden stands beside the garage. Uncle Bob had placed the paddles, life jackets, cushions, and a small waterproof box next to it. Dylan climbed out of the truck.  “Morning, Uncle Bob.” Uncle Bob looked over his coffee cup. “You’re late.” Dylan checked his phone. “It’s nine-oh-three.” “Exactly. Three minutes late.” Dorian laughed nervously. He had heard plenty of stories about Uncle Bob, but this was the first time he had met him. Dylan pointed toward … Continue readingThe Price of the Canoe

“Uncle Bob, I don’t understand it,” I said. “I’m doing everything successful people tell me to do. I go to their conferences. I listen to their podcasts. I read their books. I even dress more professionally. But I don’t feel any closer to becoming successful.” Uncle Bob leaned back in his chair and studied me for a moment. “Son, have you ever heard the African proverb, ‘No matter how long the log stays in the water, it never becomes a crocodile’?” “No.” “Well, think about it. A log can float beside a crocodile every day. It can live in … Continue readingNo Matter How Long the Log Stays in the Water, It Never Becomes a Crocodile

A few weeks after Grandma died, the family sold her house. Once the mortgage, taxes, legal expenses, and everything else were paid, I received my percentage of the money. It was more money than I had ever received at one time, but not enough to retire on. That created a problem I had never expected. I was afraid to spend it, afraid to invest it, and afraid that doing nothing would be just as foolish. Everyone had an opinion. One person told me to put it all in the stock market. Another said I should pay off every debt … Continue readingGrandma’s Final Gift

I stopped by my uncle’s house one Saturday morning because he had promised to lend me his pressure washer. As usual, the pressure washer was in the garage, but my uncle was in the kitchen drinking coffee and studying a stack of papers. “Sit down,” he said. “The machine isn’t going anywhere.” I poured myself a cup and looked at the papers scattered across the table. “What are you buying now?” I asked. “A plumbing company.” I laughed. “Uncle, you don’t know anything about plumbing.” “I know enough not to do it myself.” He slid one of the pages across … Continue readingHow to Buy a Small Business with Little or No Cash

  I stopped by my uncle’s house one afternoon to borrow his hammer drill. That was the entire plan. Walk in, borrow the drill, promise to bring it back, and leave before he found a reason to turn a five-minute visit into a two-hour lecture about life, money, politics, plumbing, or why no one builds a decent refrigerator anymore. But when my uncle opened the door, he smiled and waved me inside. “Come into the kitchen,” he said. “I have cake.” That was how he trapped you. My uncle believed cake could solve almost any problem. If it could … Continue readingLet them Eat Cake, not Slice it

It was a typical Fourth of July at Uncle Bob’s house. The grill was smoking, children were running through the yard with sparklers, and several generations of the family had gathered under the covered patio to eat too much food and argue about things nobody intended to resolve. Music played softly from a speaker near the pool. Every few minutes, someone’s phone would chirp, buzz, or light up. Across the patio, I noticed my cousin Karly sitting by herself. She was staring down at her phone and sniffling. At first, I thought the smoke from the grill had gotten … Continue readingThe Joy of Missing Out

A few weeks before my thirty fifth  birthday, I found myself sitting in Uncle Bob’s garden. He was watering his tomatoes. I wasn’t saying much. He noticed. “Something on your mind?” I nodded. “I turn thirty five in a couple weeks.” “So?” “I thought I’d have life figured out by now.” He laughed. “If you meet someone who has life figured out at thirty, introduce me. I’d like to ask them a few questions.” I smiled. “It’s more than that.” “What is it?” “I’ve been thinking about Melissa.” “The girlfriend?” “Yeah.” “You love her?” “I think so.” “You think … Continue readingTurning Thirty Five and Marriage

I have been trying to figure out what I want to do next and looking online and most of the comments were negative. By the time I got to Uncle Bob’s house, I was irritated. He was sitting in the garden, coffee in one hand and a pair of pruning shears in the other, trimming a rose bush that looked perfectly fine to me. “Uncle Bob, can I ask you something?” He smiled. “You already are.” “I’ve been reading comments online. It seems like all the older people keep telling my generation that we’re lazy.” He nodded. “Go on.” … Continue readingWas Your Generation Easier?

I just graduated college and been watching the news, and it got me depressed so ended at Uncle Bob House to see if he was up to something. “Uncle, can I ask you something?” “Of course.” “I’ve been thinking about starting a business, but honestly, I’m worried about everything. The economy. Politics. AI. The future. Some days I get so overwhelmed I don’t even know where to begin. Truth is, I’m a little depressed about it.” My uncle sat quietly for a moment, staring out over the lake. Then he smiled. “Everything will be okay eventually.” “That’s easy for … Continue readingRinse and Repeat & End of the World